It's been rough around here in relation to matters of family, both immediate and extended. Lots of contention and short tempers, flair ups and heated exchanges, some name calling and hurt feelings.
So last night in a last ditch effort to find some peace I drove myself to the Winter Quarters temple. I knew it would be closed on a Sunday night, but I just needed to be as close to my Heavemly Father as possible as I had some soul searching questions to ask him.
I began with repenting for being stubborn and proud.
For not listening to promptings I had been given weeks earlier and feeling superior to his reminders that I needed to humble myself and attempt to repair the rift that has developed in my family. I didn't want to. I didn't feel like I should have to.
I pleaded to know if it was really all worth it. All the heartache, the pain, the hurt feelings, the amount of forgiveness required to keep a family together... was it really worth it? Are family relations really worth all the trouble? I was feeling sad for myself. My eternal family was beginning to feel more like a prison sentence and less like any eternal reward for work well done. Did I really want to spend eternity with these people anyway? I could barely tolerate them for a weekend!
The answer came as it always does. A voice spoke within my heart, still and small. Filled with peace, hope and an overwhelming response...Yes...it is worth it. They are worth all the effort, all the humbling, all the pride swallowing, all the heartache, all the pain. Families are worth all the work. They are the only thing that is worth it.
While they don't make it easy, I have my answer. I will do whatever is necessary to fix it. I will honor my covenants, I will repent and try harder, I will allow myself to hear their side and be compassionate. I will focus less on being right and more on being happy.
They are the only thing that matters. God says so.
