I have a million things to blog about...before the end of 2011.
But first I have some sleep to catch up on.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Love is a temporary madness
"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
Louis De Bernieres
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
Louis De Bernieres
A Christmas Miracle
Yesterday I was playing around with the idea of making Ellorie's babyfood from scratch.
I read a website called momtastic.com and realized I could be giving her way more stuff and that she would most likely eat more if it tasted better. Ellorie has become rather stubborn about eating. She only eats when and what she wants and she will clamp her gums and lips shut and refuse to open them if its not yummy.
I tried some avocado yesterday and she loved it. And because she ate decently, she SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT!!!!!! For the first time in her life. I didn't realize it til my alarm went off this morning and I almost jumped out of bed for joy!
So now I am committed to making her food because I know she'll eat more and when she gets in all the food she needs during the day, she will sleep at night.
Hallulijah!!!!
I read a website called momtastic.com and realized I could be giving her way more stuff and that she would most likely eat more if it tasted better. Ellorie has become rather stubborn about eating. She only eats when and what she wants and she will clamp her gums and lips shut and refuse to open them if its not yummy.
I tried some avocado yesterday and she loved it. And because she ate decently, she SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT!!!!!! For the first time in her life. I didn't realize it til my alarm went off this morning and I almost jumped out of bed for joy!
So now I am committed to making her food because I know she'll eat more and when she gets in all the food she needs during the day, she will sleep at night.
Hallulijah!!!!
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Ultimake Chocolate Chip n' Oreo Fudge Brownie Bar
Ultimate Chocolate Chip Cookie n’ Oreo
Fudge Brownie Bar
1 cup (2 sticks) butter, softened
1 cup granulated sugar
3/4 cup light brown sugar
2 large eggs
1 Tablespoon pure vanilla extract
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups (12 ounces) milk chocolate chips
1 pkg Double Stuffed Oreos
1 Family Size (9×13) Brownie mix
1/4 cup hot fudge topping
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Cream the butter and both sugars in a large bowl with an electric mixer on medium speed for 3-5 minutes. Add the eggs and vanilla and mix well to thoroughly combine. In a separate bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda and salt, then slowly incorporate into the mixer until the flour is just combined. Stir in chocolate chips. Spread the cookie dough in the bottom of a 9×13 baking dish that’s been lined with wax paper and sprayed with cooking spray. Top with a layer of Oreos. Mix together brownie mix, adding an optional 1/4 cup of hot fudge topping to the mix. Pour the brownie batter over the cookie dough and Oreos. Bake at 350 degrees F for 45-55 minutes.
To half this recipe for an 8×8 brownie mix, just half the chocolate chip cookie dough ingredients. Enjoy!
*****I'm totally taking these to the RS Christmas dinner tonight and I'm making a batch for Xmas!******
recent pic of me
Today I did a few things I haven't done in ages.
1. I curled my hair. With a real curling iron. (Those things have changed since I bought one last.) The pic only shows what it looks like hours after doing it, but still its not in a ponytail and that alone is miraculous.
2. I got 2 of my 3 visiting sisters visited. I haven't done that since Indiana.
3. I got on the scale and was pleasantly surprised with my progress.
4. I made it to Sam's Club before the big lunch rush.
5. I realized I wasn't ashamed of posting a pic of myself for all the world to see. Progress.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
O Holy Night
This is my favorite Christmas hymn and this is a beautiful video. Warning, may cause goosebumps and crying.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
My new coat
It is so cold here and I realized last night that my coat from 3 winters ago doesn't quite fit yet. I found this one on Kohls.com (LOVE) found a 20%off coupon on retailmenot.com (LOVE) and got a 160.00 red wool coat (with a little sass on the side) for 76.00 plus free shipping. (LOVE)
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Parenting
I find that I am most comfortable parenting a baby. I know what to do with them. I know how to comfort them, I know how to teach them things, I know what they need from me. And I'm good at it. I feel confident with my baby skills.
I am not so confident with my "big kid" skills. I don't know what to do with Austin. I don't know how to teach him the things that will matter most or comfort him aside from hugs and kisses and ice cream. I don't know what he needs from me aside from time which I never have enough of. I feel a distance with him, and if I'm being honest with Savannah too. I feel like I'm being quartered. There is only one of me and 4 kids and they are all pulling in different directions. Then there is Ben who has his own set of needs and wants. If I'm really plugged in and devoting time to the kids, then the housework gets neglected and Ben comes home and acts annoyed and thinks I haven't done anything all day. But if I am doing housework, then I can't devote that time and energy to the kids. I only see Austin and Savannah for 5 hours each day after school and that time is spent with homework, getting in their required reading time, unwinding after a long day of school, dinner, all while still juggling two babies, and then its bedtime. Now we have basketball eating away at our time.
I've never had an almost 10 year old. This is unchartered waters for me. I guess all I can do is keep the lines of communication open and keep talking. I'm not afraid to tell him that I don't really know what I'm doing. I guess we just have to figure it out together.
I am not so confident with my "big kid" skills. I don't know what to do with Austin. I don't know how to teach him the things that will matter most or comfort him aside from hugs and kisses and ice cream. I don't know what he needs from me aside from time which I never have enough of. I feel a distance with him, and if I'm being honest with Savannah too. I feel like I'm being quartered. There is only one of me and 4 kids and they are all pulling in different directions. Then there is Ben who has his own set of needs and wants. If I'm really plugged in and devoting time to the kids, then the housework gets neglected and Ben comes home and acts annoyed and thinks I haven't done anything all day. But if I am doing housework, then I can't devote that time and energy to the kids. I only see Austin and Savannah for 5 hours each day after school and that time is spent with homework, getting in their required reading time, unwinding after a long day of school, dinner, all while still juggling two babies, and then its bedtime. Now we have basketball eating away at our time.
I've never had an almost 10 year old. This is unchartered waters for me. I guess all I can do is keep the lines of communication open and keep talking. I'm not afraid to tell him that I don't really know what I'm doing. I guess we just have to figure it out together.
Big sister
Hunter and Savannah "playing" naptime.
Most days after school, Savannah takes a little bit of time to relish some attention on Hunter and Ellorie and they just eat it up. Hunter loves that she is like a second mommy to him and is willing help him get/do the things I won't. Ellorie gets super giddy when Savannah gets close enough to grab ahold of her hair. Then she doesen't let go and keeps Savannah close. She's such a wonderful big sister.
Daily dose of cuteness
I forget to get the camara out most days, but some days the stars align just right and I'm given the blessing of a happy baby, fully charged batteries and a small window of time to capture all her sweetness. Enjoy!
FYI- believe it or not, she is not a thumb sucker. She just really likes to chew on it.
Friday, December 2, 2011
She would have been 3
From my first thought today, I knew something wasn't right. Nothing has gone my way, nothing. Its like the universe was trying to tell me to just stay in bed today. Everything I attempted to do today was an epic fail. The gym, didn't make it. Print our family pics, forgot the CD then forgot my wallet. Got the prints home, only had half of them. I just couldn't shake the feeling that today was significant, but I couldn't think of why.
Then on my way to Target at 9Pm, it hit me. Today was my due date for our sweet angel baby, my baby number 3 that didn't make it. The universe was reminding me to think of her, grieve for her, and reminding me to be my best so that one day I can return to Heaven and hold her in my arms.
Then on my way to Target at 9Pm, it hit me. Today was my due date for our sweet angel baby, my baby number 3 that didn't make it. The universe was reminding me to think of her, grieve for her, and reminding me to be my best so that one day I can return to Heaven and hold her in my arms.
Hunter's tooth
As you can see, he wouldn't really let me get a good pic but this is what I got. Its still all the way up in his gums. When he smiles now, it looks like the tooth is missing, but its still there.
He has bumped it a few times in the past few weeks and its still sore. He bumped it once and the gums in the front split going up and down but that seems to be healing. He was reluctant to go back to the gym, but he's fine.
Tough guy.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
An American Christmas
Dan Lazar wrote this. He is my cousins husband, a small business owner and a proud American. Please read this, then share it.
"As the holidays approach, the giant Asian factories are kicking into high gear to provide Americans with monstrous piles of cheaply produced goods -- merchandise that has been produced at the expense of American labor.
This year will be different. This year Americans will give the gift of genuine concern for other Americans. There is no longer an excuse that, at gift-giving time, nothing can be found that is produced by American hands. Yes there is!
It's time to think outside the box, people. Who says a gift needs to fit in a shirt box?
Everyone -- yes EVERYONE gets their hair cut. How about gift certificates from your local American hair salon or barber?
Gym membership? It's appropriate for all ages who are thinking about some health improvement.
Who wouldn't appreciate getting their car detailed? Small, American-owned detail shops and car washes would love to sell you a gift certificate or a book of gift certificates.
Are you one of those extravagant givers who think nothing of plunking down the Benjamin’s on a Chinese made flat-screen? Perhaps that grateful gift receiver would like his driveway sealed, or lawn mowed for the summer, or driveway plowed all winter, or games at the local golf course.
There are a bazillion owner-run restaurants -- all offering gift certificates. And, if your intended isn't the fancy eatery sort, what about a half-dozen breakfasts at the local breakfast joint. Remember, folks this isn't about big National chains -- this is about supporting your home town Americans with their financial lives on the line to keep their doors open.
How many people couldn't use an oil change for their car, truck or motorcycle, done at a shop run by the American working guy?
Thinking about a heartfelt gift for mom? Mom would LOVE the services of a local cleaning lady for a day. How about a massage?
My computer could use a tune-up, and I KNOW I can find some young guy who is struggling to get his repair business up and running.
OK, you were looking for something more personal. Local crafts people spin their own wool and knit them into scarves. They make jewelry, and pottery and beautiful wooden boxes.
Plan your holiday outings at local, owner-operated restaurants and leave your server a nice tip. And, how about going out to see a play or ballet at your hometown theater.
Musicians need love too, so find a venue showcasing local bands.
Honestly, people, do you REALLY need to buy another ten thousand Chinese lights for the house? When you buy a five dollar string of light, about fifty cents stays in the community. If you have those kinds of bucks to burn, leave the mailman, trash guy or babysitter a nice BIG tip.
You see, Christmas is no longer about draining American pockets so that China can build another glittering city. Christmas is now about caring about US, encouraging American small businesses to keep plugging away to follow their dreams. And, when we care about other Americans, we care about our communities, and the benefits come back to us in ways we couldn't imagine.
THIS is the new American Christmas tradition.
Forward this to everyone on your mailing list -- post it to discussion groups -- throw up a post on Craigslist in the Rants and Raves section in your city -- send it to the editor of your local paper and radio stations,
and TV news departments. This is a revolution of caring about each other. Isn't that what Christmas is about?"
"As the holidays approach, the giant Asian factories are kicking into high gear to provide Americans with monstrous piles of cheaply produced goods -- merchandise that has been produced at the expense of American labor.
This year will be different. This year Americans will give the gift of genuine concern for other Americans. There is no longer an excuse that, at gift-giving time, nothing can be found that is produced by American hands. Yes there is!
It's time to think outside the box, people. Who says a gift needs to fit in a shirt box?
Everyone -- yes EVERYONE gets their hair cut. How about gift certificates from your local American hair salon or barber?
Gym membership? It's appropriate for all ages who are thinking about some health improvement.
Who wouldn't appreciate getting their car detailed? Small, American-owned detail shops and car washes would love to sell you a gift certificate or a book of gift certificates.
Are you one of those extravagant givers who think nothing of plunking down the Benjamin’s on a Chinese made flat-screen? Perhaps that grateful gift receiver would like his driveway sealed, or lawn mowed for the summer, or driveway plowed all winter, or games at the local golf course.
There are a bazillion owner-run restaurants -- all offering gift certificates. And, if your intended isn't the fancy eatery sort, what about a half-dozen breakfasts at the local breakfast joint. Remember, folks this isn't about big National chains -- this is about supporting your home town Americans with their financial lives on the line to keep their doors open.
How many people couldn't use an oil change for their car, truck or motorcycle, done at a shop run by the American working guy?
Thinking about a heartfelt gift for mom? Mom would LOVE the services of a local cleaning lady for a day. How about a massage?
My computer could use a tune-up, and I KNOW I can find some young guy who is struggling to get his repair business up and running.
OK, you were looking for something more personal. Local crafts people spin their own wool and knit them into scarves. They make jewelry, and pottery and beautiful wooden boxes.
Plan your holiday outings at local, owner-operated restaurants and leave your server a nice tip. And, how about going out to see a play or ballet at your hometown theater.
Musicians need love too, so find a venue showcasing local bands.
Honestly, people, do you REALLY need to buy another ten thousand Chinese lights for the house? When you buy a five dollar string of light, about fifty cents stays in the community. If you have those kinds of bucks to burn, leave the mailman, trash guy or babysitter a nice BIG tip.
You see, Christmas is no longer about draining American pockets so that China can build another glittering city. Christmas is now about caring about US, encouraging American small businesses to keep plugging away to follow their dreams. And, when we care about other Americans, we care about our communities, and the benefits come back to us in ways we couldn't imagine.
THIS is the new American Christmas tradition.
Forward this to everyone on your mailing list -- post it to discussion groups -- throw up a post on Craigslist in the Rants and Raves section in your city -- send it to the editor of your local paper and radio stations,
and TV news departments. This is a revolution of caring about each other. Isn't that what Christmas is about?"
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